The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 33

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 33 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

In the years up to the Civil War, the young American Nation struggled mightily over the horrific experience of Slavery.  The governance principle over this issue beginning with the first Congress in 1790 was that its lawfulness was solely an issue for that each State to decide for itself.  But, as the Nation grew rapidly, new states were being added all the time and a great concern arose in Congress about the balance of power between the slave states and free states. In 1850, a Compromise was reached allowing California to be admitted to the Union as a free state. The primary offset for the slave states was the enactment of the Fugitive Slave Act which made it a crime for anyone in a free state to harbor a fugitive slave and required the law enforcement agencies of all states to prosecute all such offenders. Fugitive slaves captured in this process were not accorded any rights, just returned to their original slave masters in the South.

The novelist, Toni Morrison, won a Pulitzer Prize in 1988, for her story, Beloved, about a woman, named Sethe, living in Ohio in the 1870’s in the aftermath of the Civil War.  She is haunted by events 20 years earlier, when, as a fugitive slave living free in Ohio, she is found by bounty hunters working for her former slave master.  In a desperate act at the time, she murders her daughter rather than risk that she be chained to a life in slavery.  Written in the heavy African American dialect of the time and with complex character development, this is a very powerful story. Most importantly, though, it carries a profound psychical energy about the presence of slavery in our American Heritage, a condition which has influenced our history in so many powerful and tragic ways for so many centuries.

From our perspective here, I see this tale as a wonderful example of the power of story to convey the mythos of a horrific history. For all of us, the multitudinous, disastrous experiences of our active life in the disease were equally horrific.  Breaking free from these conditions required extreme measures.  Faced with the recurring experience of unspeakable behaviors in our alcoholic lives, we got to the point where something inside of us, some element of our imbedded addict, had to die. Such action was necessary to prevent further disasters.  Just as Sethe kept her daughter from slavery and the United States finally outlawed the practice of keeping slaves, a fundamental change in ourselves was critical. Doing whatever it took became necessary to avoid the likelihood that our life would continue to descend into an abyss of slavery-like conditions, each of us entirely enslaved to the masters that are alcohol and drugs.

The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 32

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 32 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

In the mythos of the Greek experience in history, the fundamental tragic flaw was hubris, debilitating self-pride. The heroes in many stories became so exalted in their activities that they assumed qualities and stature resembling the gods, at least to themselves, men like Achilles, Agamemnon, Icarus, Lucifer, Midas, Odysseus, Oedipus, to name a few. Their behavior eventually angered the gods so much that they were crushed with serious accidents or defeats, events that were their ignominious downfalls.

For some of us with the disease of alcoholism, where the descent into the depths of the disease occurred a bit later in life, our earlier lives may have been parallels to these ancient heroes, full of ascents and achievements that were reminiscent of them, if a bit less laudatory.

Many of us were born into families of stature but devoid of love and nurture. We learned early on to strive to achieve with relentless determination, surpassing everyone’s expectations but with little concern for others. We learned to play by the rules until we figured out which rules could be broken without consequences. Our budding narcissism grew to the point where family and friends were only good for furthering our own selfish needs; abuse became the norm.

Alcohol was always a release, but the pressure of the world we were creating made the medicating effects of alcohol, in increasingly absurd quantities, more and more necessary. We found comfort, however fleeting, in dark walnut-paneled sanctuaries, with altars of gleaming bottles and brightly colored spirits, and with aromas as intoxicating as incense to a monk, sanctuaries where we could worship in Dionysian revelry for hours on end. We found companionship in supple, amply-endowed, if anonymous, counterparts who were only an ATM away. Our behaviors in these activities increased over time until they were nothing more than a rapidly accelerating descent into ugliness and depravity…and, eventually, into a state of “pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization.”

Like many of the Greek heroes, our wallowing in the “ignominy of defeat” led only to a desperate search for redemption. Struggling with the torment of our behaviors, we finally succumbed to the dictum of “doing whatever it takes.” We entered the “rooms” and sought the fellowship of recovery. As difficult as was the separation from the medication and the behaviors that precipitated their consumption, the discovery of the Fellowship and its “prescription for living” became increasingly glorious.

In the later stages of his journey, Odysseus was stripped of everything and landed naked and broken on Scheria. He told his story to the assembled in the palace of King Alcinos, was granted asylum, and then fitted out for the final journey to Ithaca, his home. It is here he finally achieved all his heart could have wanted under the guidance of the goddess Athena. All of us find that life in the journey to Recovery is very much like that…glorious in a place on the Earth that has all the wonders of a palace which has been built with the grace of our Higher Power.

The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 31

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 31 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

King George for Bob Wagner post 31The movie, The King’s Speech, with Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush, is about King George VI who, despite a terrible speech impediment, must conquer his affliction and rise up to lead England in its critical opposition to Germany in the years up to the beginning of WWII. It is a stirring portrayal of the courage of a leader and his people in one of the ugliest times in human history. This period has always held a fascination for me, having been born in its early years, because it required so much courage of everyone, so much energy in the face of enormous terrors for everyone, leaders and citizens alike.

But it also occurs to me that, in our struggles to initiate and maintain a life of sobriety, sobriety from the substances and behavior of addiction as well as a psychical sobriety from the behavior patterns that attended our addictions, we mirror just this kind of courage. For each and every one of us, our lives in the throes of addiction were just as fearsome and dangerous to our individual lives and those around us as was the scourge of Nazism and Fascism of Germany, Italy, and Imperial Japan…and then Communist Russia and China…to the multitudinous communities of the free world in the 1930’s, 40’s and 50’s.

Looking at this from the same perspective, each of us, enslaved in the throes of addictive consumptions and behaviors, had to summon incredible individual fortitude to step through the Gates of Recovery and pursue a better life. It required a courage and resolve that mirrored that for those who landed in the surf of Omaha Beach in the Normandy invasion of June 1944.

Achieving a semblance of Sobriety, and a life in the Fellowships we all enjoy in our sober lives, provide an incredible sense of joy and achievement, despite the work necessary to maintain a safe haven from addiction.  It is a sense of joy that mirrors that felt by the entire free world when the ultimate defeats of German, Italy and Japan were achieved in 1945.

The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 30

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 30 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

Hellboy comicMuch of the modern comic and graphic novel genre focuses on the paranormal activities of figures of unusual maybe even absurd abilities.  One such figure is Hellboy, a creature spawned in Hell and accidentally released into the real world through a series of experiments by certain fictitious Nazi scientists. Hellboy’s ascension into the World and the places he found himself were also facilitated by the work of a British scientist and the US Air Force, who take him to a secret facility in New Mexico, where he is raised and, despite his origin in Hell, becomes a very powerful force for good.

Hellboy’s escapades, as told in many, many stories, have him conquering all sorts of evil forces with a power and vengeance that is captivating, despite his name and original history. The creator of Hellboy, Mike Mignola, found much of the inspiration for stories and characters in the mythologies of various ancient cultures. Hecate, for instance, who was a Greek goddess of crossroads, magic, and demons, is this fierce and nearly invincible demon who engages Hellboy in fearsome struggles, only to have Hellboy ultimately prevail. In another episode, Hellboy must venture down into Hell and confront various supernatural powers that attended his original procreation.  Much of these stories are parallels to our individual lives in our diseases of alcoholism and addiction as are the struggles we had to confront, some quite long and drawn out, to gain a life in Sobriety.

All of us in our disease could easily have been described as hellboys, people who in near alcoholic stupors were just incarnations of devil-like beings.  I can’t remember how many times, after a particularly long and planned-to-be-festive holiday, it was said to me, “Here’s another holiday you have ruined for us.”

It is good to know that this “Hellboy” is also turning the corner into a dominant force for good.

The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 29

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 29 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

In 1933, the Jewish population of Europe was approx 9.5 million.  In 1950, it was approx 3.5 million.  While there were some emigrations before the intense Nazi persecutions began in 1938 and after WWII ended in 1945, the vast bulk of that reduction was the systematic murder of nearly 6 million by the Nazis during that intervening period. The Holocaust was a wretched chapter in human history and we can debate forever why and how it could possibly have happened…especially considering the vast number of both victims who were killed and perpetrators who made conscious decisions to participate in the killing or ignore the reality that it was happening.

Wars and horrific events that are occasioned by wars are an ever present experience in the history of the human species.  They have always seemed to me to have happened when our basest natures begin to rule our activities, for whatever reasons. It is almost as if wars and the horrific events around wars represent the collective of societies acting out in a massive alcoholic rage. I believe there is a parallel here to each of us in our diseased states.

Our individual alcoholism, the elements of our psyches that set us up to an ugly descent into the abyss of demoralization, shame, fear, and pain, may have had many causes. These conditions can happen for collectives as well. Thinking of what happened in the Holocaust, in all its phases, it seems that there are parallels to the most despicable of our behaviors in our diseased states.

This may be why, for those of us fully committed to living lives in the pursuit of sobriety, our new-found, 12-step based behavior is so critical to the societies in which we live. It is clear that the experience of the long history of the human species is to higher and higher levels of consciousness. As human societies evolve to these greater states, those of us carrying the message, modeling new behavior, motivated solely from a consciousness of service, will be the agents of ultimate change.  Service to everyone, individually and collectively, service to the Cosmos from a profound position of humility, must be our fundamental calling.

The Lifelong Quest For Sobriety…The Ultimate Hero’s Journey—Part 28

Guest Blogger and long-time Council friend, Bob W. presents Part 28 of a series dealing with Alcoholism and Addiction from a Mystical, Mythological Perspective, reflecting Bob’s scholarly work as a Ph.D. in mythological studies.

Days of Wine Roses Image
Days of Wine & Roses

When I was 19, in 1962, I remember going to see the movie Days of Wine and Roses, about a couple struggling with alcoholism. Joe, played by Jack Lemmon, and Kirsten, played by Lee Remick, descend from active social drinking into desperate alcoholism.  An otherwise normal couple in the corporate world of New York in the 1950’s, their descent is gradual until numerous bouts of out-of-control binging begin to destroy their lives.  Joe pursues recovery through AA, with Jack Klugman as Jim, his sponsor, providing an excellent portrayal of the sponsor role.  Kirsten struggles much more mightily with the disease but fails in the end.  Joe and she split up and she just disappears into a world of out-of-control drinking.

From my perspective, this movie is one of the really good, early-on portrayals of the true nature of this disease.  It also resonates with me because it carries the imagery and ambiance, and the ever presence of alcohol, of the business world in New York where I began my adult life.

We all know that there are many more sad stories of people in this disease than there are happy ones. When I saw this movie, I was far away from my disease, although my father had struggled his whole life, so I had some inkling.  But the movie’s end struck me very powerfully.  Joe was in recovery, and Kirsten, still in the disease, came to see him to suggest they get back together.  He says he will but only if she gives up drinking.  She responds, “Joe, the world looks so dirty to me when I am not drinking.  Remember Fisherman’s Wharf…the water so fuzzy when you looked too close? That’s the way the world looks to me when I am not drinking.”

The movie closes with Joe looking out the window of his apartment into a rainy night seeing Kirsten walk away down the street and disappear.  The power of that scene to me at the time, a 19 year old in 1962, begs some explanation, which I cannot provide.  Perhaps it was some element of the imbedded nature of my life with alcohol present even at such an early time.  But, whatever it was, from the perspective of today, it is a spectacular manifestation of what we can enjoy in the continuing pursuit of committed sobriety.